Can you cry under water?
>
> _____
>
>
>How important does a person have to be before they are
>considered
>assassinated instead of just murdered?
>
> _____
>
>
>Why do you have to "put your two cents in".. . but
>it's only a "penny
>for your thoughts"? Where's that extra penny going to?
>
> _____
>
>
>Once you're in heaven, do you get stuck wearing the
>clothes you were
>buried in for eternity?
>
> _____
>
>
>Why does a round pizza come in a square box?
>
> _____
>
>
>What disease did cured ham actually have?
>
> _____
>
>
>How is it that we put man on the moon before we
>figured out it would be
>a good idea to put wheels on luggage?
>
> _____
>
>
>Why is it that people say they "slept like a baby"
>when babies wake up
>like every two hours?
>
> _____
>
>
>If a deaf person has to go to court, is it still
>called a hearing?
>
> _____
>
>
>Why are you IN a movie, but you're ON TV?
>
> _____
>
>
>Why do people pay to go up tall buildings and then put
>money in
>binoculars to look at things on the ground?
>
> _____
>
>
>Why do doctors leave the room while you change?
>They're going to see you
>naked anyway.
>
> _____
>
>
>Why is "bra" singular and "panties" plural
>
> _____
>
>
>Why do toasters always have a setting that burns the
>toast to a horrible
>crisp, which no decent human being would eat?
>
> _____
>
>
>If Jimmy cracks corn and no one cares, why is there a
>stupid song about
>him?
>
> _____
>
>
>Can a hearse carrying a corpse drive in the carpool
>lane?
>
> _____
>
>
>If the professor on Gilligan's Island can make a radio
>out of a coconut,
>why can't he fix a hole in a boat?
>
> _____
>
>
>Why does Goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all
>fours? They're
>both dogs!
>
> _____
>
>
>If Wiley E. Coyote had enough money to buy all that
>ACME crap, why
>didn't he just buy dinner?
>
> _____
>
>
>If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is
>made from
>vegetables, what is baby oil made from?
>
> _____
>
>
>If electricity comes from electrons, does morality
>come from morons?
>
> _____
>
>
>Do the Alphabet song and Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star
>have the same
>tune?
>
> _____
>
>
>Why did you just try singing the two songs above?
>
> _____
>
>
>Why do they call it an asteroid when it's outside the
>hemisphere, but
>call it a hemorrhoid when it's in your butt?
>
> _____
>
>
>Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog's
>face, he gets mad at
>you, but when you take him for a car ride; he sticks
>his head out the
>window?
>

LOL - of course I sang the two songs.. they do!

I can't help but add a few similar musings....

Why do we park on driveways, but drive on parkways?


Why is stuff sent on a truck called a "shipment," but stuff sent on a ship called "cargo?"

Why is there an expiration date on sour cream?

When someone says, "Lost things always turn up in the last place you look," do you wonder if there's some moron out there that would keep looking AFTER he found something?

If "pro" is the opposite of "con," does that make "progress" the opposite of "congress?"

If the instructions on the shampoo bottle always say "Later, rinse, repeat," how do you know when to stop?

If you plan to fail, and succeed, which have you accomplished?

If all the world's a stage, where does the audience sit?

If a man makes a sound and no woman is around to hear him, is he still wrong?

How can cows who stand in mud always get clean, but one stain on a leather suede jacket be permanent?

If a small town has only one barber, who cuts *his* hair?

Why does fabric come in "bolts," but concrete come in "yards?"

Why do people always say "ATM machine," when ATM means "automated teller *machine*"?

Why is a boxing "ring" always square?

Why do noses run and feet smell?

How can a building burn down while burning up?

If farmers farm, golfers golf, and hikers hike, what do fingers do?

..Can't remember any more right now.

-SoonerDave