View Full Version : Favorite thing to do on toilet



Jack
02-28-2006, 08:14 PM
What's your favorite thing to do on the toilet?

Midtowner
02-28-2006, 08:15 PM
Jack, have you been on the toilet all night?

Seriously, lay off the drugs man.

TheImmortal
02-28-2006, 09:49 PM
Umm well..the natural thing you do on the toilet. And yes watch the drugs, lets stick with Jack in the Box not Crack in the Box.

mranderson
03-01-2006, 09:04 AM
Someone must be really bored to come up with this thread.

Patrick
03-01-2006, 11:20 AM
I'd have to say reading the newspaper, or working on homework or something.

Jack
03-01-2006, 11:23 AM
Guys, it was a valid question. If you don't like it, choose not to participate.

Jack
03-02-2006, 09:05 PM
I personally like to poop.

Midtowner
03-02-2006, 09:26 PM
I'd have to say reading the newspaper, or working on homework or something.

So wait.. if someone buys your used books, they can pretty much count on the fact that you were pooping when you read them.

I'm glad I'm not in med school :)

gbyte
03-02-2006, 11:01 PM
Using the bathroom at work (http://www.jomonkey.com/phpbb/viewtopic.php?t=123&view=next&sid=d6bc36b4e67a941694063ae050109225)

Jack
03-02-2006, 11:20 PM
Thanks for the good list of suggestions gbyte. I'll print it off and put it on my desk at work, and take it with me when I have to go to the bathroom.

Faith
03-03-2006, 11:09 AM
My husband likes to talk on the phone when in the bathroom. And a few of my sisters do the same. I don't think I will ever understand their way of thinking. My husband also likes to sing in the bathroom. Whether he is taking a shower, shaving, or using the toilet he sings alot.

Patrick
03-03-2006, 11:36 AM
So wait.. if someone buys your used books, they can pretty much count on the fact that you were pooping when you read them.

I'm glad I'm not in med school :)

Yeah, we have to practice the genital exam while we're on the pot. LOL!.

Karried
03-03-2006, 11:51 AM
gbyte, I had to post this in case someone didn't catch the link..

I am laughing so hard, I have tears! This is so funny:

HOW TO POOP AT WORK
We've all been there but don't like to admit it. We've all been
working in our cubicles and suddenly felt something brewing down
below. As much as we try to convince ourselves otherwise, the WORK
POOP is inevitable. For those who hate pooping at work, following is
the Survival Guide for taking a dump at work.
CROP DUSTING
When farting, you walk really fast around the office so the smell is
not in your area and everyone else gets a whiff but doesn't know where
it came from. Be careful when you do this. Do not stop until the full
fart has been expelled. Walk an extra 30 feet to make sure the smell
has left your pants.
FLY BY
The act of scouting out a bathroom before pooping. Walk in and check
for other poopers. If there are others in the bathroom, leave and come
back again. Be careful not to become a FREQUENT FLYER. People may
become suspicious if they catch you constantly going into the
bathroom.
ESCAPEE
A fart that slips out while taking a leak at the urinal or forcing a
poop in a stall. This is usually accompanied by a sudden wave of
embarrassment. If you release an escapee, do not acknowledge it.
Pretend it did not happen. If you are standing next to the farter in
the urinal, pretend you did not hear it. No one likes an escapee. It
is uncomfortable for all involved. Making a joke or laughing makes
both parties feel uneasy.
JAILBREAK
When forcing a poop, several farts slip out at a machine gun pace.
This is usually a side effect of diarrhea or a hangover. If this
should happen, do not panic. Remain in the stall until everyone has
left the bathroom to spare everyone the awkwardness of what just
occurred.
COURTESY FLUSH
The act of flushing the toilet the instant the poop hits the water.
This reduces the amount of air time the poop has to stink up the
bathroom. This can help you avoid being caught doing the WALK OF
SHAME.
WALK OF SHAME
Walking from the stall, to the sink, to the door after you have just
stunk up the bathroom.. This can be a very uncomfortable moment if
someone walks in and busts you.. As with farts, it is best to pretend
that the smell does not exist. Can be avoided with the use of the
COURTESY FLUSH.
OUT OF THE CLOSET POOPER
A colleague who poops at work and is damn proud of it. You will often
see an Out Of The Closet Pooper enter the bathroom with a newspaper or
magazine under their arm. Always look around the office for the Out Of
The Closet Pooper before entering the bathroom.
THE POOPING FRIENDS NETWORK (P.F.N)
A group of co-workers who band together to ensure emergency pooping
goes off without incident. This group can help you to monitor the
whereabouts of Out Of The Closet Poopers, and identify SAFE HAVENS.
SAFE HAVENS
A seldom used bathroom somewhere in the building where you can least
expect visitors. Try floors that are predominantly of the opposite
sex (L*O*V*E*). This will reduce the odds of a pooper of your sex (L*O*V*E*) entering the
bathroom.
TURD BURGLAR
Someone who does not realize that you are in the stall and tries to
force the door open. This is one of the most shocking and vulnerable
moments that can occur when taking a poop at work. If this occurs,
remain in the stall until the Turd Burglar leaves. This way you will
avoid all uncomfortable eye contact.
CAMO-COUGH
A phony cough that alerts all new entrants into the bathroom that you
are in a stall. This can be used to cover-up a WATERMELON, or to alert
potential Turd Burglars. Very effective when used in conjunction with
an ASTAIRE.
ASTAIRE
A subtle toe-tap that is used to alert potential Turd Burglars that
you are occupying a stall. This will remove all doubt that the stall
is occupied. If you hear an Astaire, leave the bathroom immediately so
the pooper can poop in peace.
WATERMELON
A poop that creates a loud splash when hitting the toilet water. This
is also an embarrassing incident. If you feel a Watermelon coming on,
create a diversion. See CAMO-COUGH.
HAVANAOMELET
A case of diarrhea that creates a series of loud splashes in the
toilet water. Often accompanied by an Escapee. Try using a Camo-Cough
with an Astaire. You can also use that moment to noisily procure a
handful of toilet paper.
UNCLE TED
A bathroom user who seems to linger around forever. Could spend
extended lengths of time in front of the mirror or sitting on the pot.
An Uncle Ted makes it difficult to relax while on the crapper, as you
should always wait to poop when the bathroom is empty. This benefits
you as well as the other bathroom attendees.

Jack
03-03-2006, 11:56 AM
Ever tried to cook dinner on the pot? That's an interesting one.

BDP
03-03-2006, 12:31 PM
I use my laptop to post on OKCtalk.com.

Karried
03-03-2006, 12:41 PM
ewwwwwwww LOL - now I have a visual going thanks BDP! :Smiley275

gbyte
03-03-2006, 01:04 PM
Yeah they are pretty funny....I have seen a few of them off/on before and after seeing a big list had to dig it up for this thread :)


As a kid / teenager I used to read alot while on the toilet. Nowadays I just think about all the different little things I need to get done and what to do about each...

Keith
03-04-2006, 04:01 PM
My husband likes to talk on the phone when in the bathroom. And a few of my sisters do the same. I don't think I will ever understand their way of thinking. My husband also likes to sing in the bathroom. Whether he is taking a shower, shaving, or using the toilet he sings alot.
Gross.....I could never talk on the phone while sitting on the toilet. As a matter of fact, the bathroom is probably the only place I don't take my cell phone. I used to take my cell phone in the bathroom with me, but the echo was terrible. Those on the other line knew exactly where I was at. Actually, my bathroom time is thinking time.........and concentrating time. No singing, no talking, and no reading, just thinking.

Plop Plop Fizz Fizz, Oh what a relief it is...........:tweeted: and I can't believe I am actually posting on this thread.

Randy
03-04-2006, 06:47 PM
Gross.....I could never talk on the phone while sitting on the toilet. As a matter of fact, the bathroom is probably the only place I don't take my cell phone. I used to take my cell phone in the bathroom with me, but the echo was terrible. Those on the other line knew exactly where I was at. Actually, my bathroom time is thinking time.........and concentrating time. No singing, no talking, and no reading, just thinking.

Plop Plop Fizz Fizz, Oh what a relief it is...........:tweeted: and I can't believe I am actually posting on this thread.
I can talk on the phone and eat a sandwich when I am on the toilet. I have two hands and I keep them busy. The smell doesn't bother me, although the sandwich does start smelling funny after a while. I also like to eat prunes while pooping. Sometimes it seems like I will never get off the crapper.

mranderson
03-04-2006, 07:20 PM
Writing posts on OKC Talk is a favorite thing to do during those times.

Jack
03-06-2006, 09:41 AM
I saw an ape once at the zoo who kept wiping his but, then putting his hand in his mouth. I think he was eating it.

Jack
03-06-2006, 09:42 AM
What is your favorite thing to do in the bathroom?

upisgr8
03-06-2006, 11:00 AM
http://i41.photobucket.com/albums/e268/upisgr8/rretarded.jpg

http://i41.photobucket.com/albums/e268/upisgr8/instructions.jpg

AFCM
03-10-2006, 02:44 PM
I guess I'm the only one who acts out an imaginary interview with Guitar magazine in my head.

"Guitar Magazine: Your new album, soon to be released, has a great sound to it. Let's start by talking about the great riffs and time signatures your band incorporated. What was the inspiration behind that?

AFCM: Well, as you know I've always been greatly influenced by Metallica and...."

Come on, am I the only one who still dreams of making it big?